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"Keep it Up!"

One good thing about Pittsburgh is that you're not likely to ever run into celebrities. Yeah, touring artists will come through town for shows or conventions, and one time I saw Joe Manganiello strut down the sidewalk while I was eating at a hot dog restaurant. But it's not like I'm ever going to get on a random elevator and have to make small talk with Anne Hathaway or something. 

Why is this good? Because any contact I've ever had with any public or-semi-public figure has been absolutely mortifying. 

I'm not a person who worships or even has an outsize respect for celebrity. I'd be way more excited to run into an old friend than a favorite actor. As much as I enjoy talking to friends and regular people, I have nothing of value to say to anyone I recognize solely through their public work- especially if I particularly admire it. I don't take time to formulate thoughtful, concise words of appreciation and I always say something clumsy and inelegant instead. 

Sadly, this happens even when I initiate contact in a way that should grant me some opportunity for pre-meditation. One time I emailed the cartoonist Kate Beaton, long before any of her work was properly published, and told her that her work was lovely and that she should "keep it up!"

What am I, her softball coach? I stand by the sentiment, but what an embarrassing way to put it. I would feel guilty about it also being sexist and reductive if I didn't also say it to male indie rockers, comic book artists, and I think John Hodgman one time. 

The closest thing I ever had to a good run-in with a public figure was the time I saw former mayor Bob O'Connor downtown when I was walking to work one morning in 2006. I half raised my hand in a wave of recognition, and he acknowledged me by raising his coffee cup an inch or two and bellowing a hearty "HOW YA DOIN'!"

O'Connor died during his first year in office and I was amused to learn during eulogies on the news that HOW YA DOIN was practically his catch phrase. He didn't live long enough for me to know what I would have thought about his policies in the long term, but I do admire the strategy to just have a thing you say when you need one.

I still daydream about what my go-to phrase should or could be. I've already eliminated "keep it up!" 




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